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1 month ago
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Fans of the Beckham family have been left gobsmacked by Brooklyn Beckham's outspoken statement on the ongoing family feud.
The 26–year–old posted a series of Stories on Instagram, claiming his family tried to 'ruin' his relationship with his wife, Nicola Peltz Beckham.
So, why has the Brooklyn decided to go 'nuclear' now?
While the true reason remains unclear, science could help to shed light on his decision.
According to Dr Claire Jack, there are five key signs that it's time to finally cut toxic family ties.
'Cutting your family off is also seen as a taboo,' she explained in an article for Psychology Today.
'People who do so are often labelled as "bad" or selfish and to many outsiders, the emotional abuse is so hidden within the family that friends and other relations just can't see why you would need to distance yourself in this way.
'So, when is it right to cut yourself off?'
Fans of the Beckham family have been left gobsmacked by Brooklyn Beckham's outspoken statement on the ongoing family feud
1. Your family's treatment is severely impacting you
The first key sign that it's finally time to cut toxic ties is if your family's treatment is severely impacting you, Dr Jack explains.
'If your toxic family continues to disrespect you, to ignore your boundaries, and to gaslight you, you have every right to cut ties,' she said.
'You do, in fact, have the right to do this at any time, but many people wait until they realise the full impact of staying in these relationships.'
2. There is nothing positive to be gained from the relationship
Whether it's to stay in touch with siblings or because you're involved in a parent's care, you might initially feel like there are positives to be gained in maintaining the relationship with your family.
However, Dr Jack advises weighing up what you will gain with what you will lose.
'If you feel there is nothing positive in your relationship, then it might be time to think about cutting your ties,' she wrote.
The 26–year–old posted a series of Stories on Instagram, claiming his family tried to 'ruin' his relationship with his wife, Nicola Peltz Beckham
The 5 signs it's time to cut family ties
- Your family's treatment is severely impacting you
- There is nothing positive to be gained from the relationship
- You realise your family is not a sacred institution
- You confront your family and they don't listen
- You realise your treatment is unacceptable
3. You realise your family is not a sacred institution
Growing up, many of us see families as sacred institutions.
This is one of the main reasons why cutting ties is often regarded as taboo, according to Dr Jack.
'When you make sense of your own experiences and realise that your particular family is not a safe and supportive place, it may be time to leave,' she explained.
4. You confront your family and they don't listen
If you decide to confront your family with your case and they don't listen, it may be time to cut ties once and for all.
'[If] they respond by telling you that you're making it up, that you're 'weird,' or they become aggressive towards you, it's probably time to leave,' Dr Jack said.
'These people are never going to see your point of view or admit any of their shortfallings.'
5. You realise your treatment is unacceptable
During a family fight, many people take time to look back on their childhoods – and some realise that things that happened in their childhood were unacceptable.
'Often people are well into their forties or fifties before they realise that their treatment was unacceptable,' Dr Jack added.
'When you realise this, and particularly if you're gaslighted when you try and confront an abuser, it may be time for you to distance yourself.'
FAILING TO PURSUE A LOVED ONE AND NOT TRAVELLING THE WORLD AMONG THE 'BIGGEST REGRETS'
Across six studies two researchers, Dr Shai Davidai from the New School for Social Research and Professor Thomas Gilovich of Cornell University, examined the idea that deepest regrets come from not pursuing our most ambitious dreams.
They found that these deep-rooted regrets stem from such things as not pursuing a loved one, abandoning hopes of playing a musical instrument and not travelling the world.
These relate to what is dubbed a person's 'ideal-self' - the image every person has in their head of who they are and the type of person they want to be.
Other examples from anonymous volunteers, whose ages are in brackets, included:
• 'I sold [my shares in] Netflix and Facebook before the huge run-up after 2011' (29 years old)
• 'About ten years ago I went on a big diet and lost 53lb. I held the weight off for years. I thought I would never gain the weight back and totally regret all the food mistakes I've made' (43 years old)
• 'My freshman year of college I was offered an incredible opportunity to do my own research in two different countries. I didn't go because my family didn't want me to go and I had concerns over finances to do with my apartment, funding it and my pet' (22 years old)
• 'My biggest regret was not going to graduate school when I had the opportunity. I have found success elsewhere and raised my family how I wanted to, but I have always regretted not going' (54 years old)
• 'My biggest regret in life was not pursuing my dream of singing. I followed a traditional route instead and became a teacher. The dream remains... the what if!' (62 years old)
• 'I regret not having more fun in high school' (18 years old)
• 'I regret not having gotten involved in anything extracurricular during my high school years. I was in the national honour society but that hardly counts (33 years old)
• 'I regret not keeping in touch with my best friend in college. It pains me that we lost touch' (26 years old)
• 'I did not pursue a career in acting when I was younger. I feel like I gave up on my dream because of doubts others had. I wish I could go back in time and tell my younger self to believe in my talent more' (35 years old)
• 'Letting go of a girl that was an incredible match for me in almost every aspect imaginable because I was in a relationship with someone who I knew wasn't right for me' (30 years old)
• 'The biggest regret was to remarry and leave a job, home and state I was happy with. I made a terrible mistake and gave up way to much to alleviate a loneliness I was feeling. What a fool I was' (71 years old)
• 'Many years ago when my husband and I first married, we nearly bought our dream house. It wasn't ideal but we loved it. We decided not to buy it as we felt pressure from our parents. I regret not stepping up, being an adult and going with my gut feeling. I regret letting our parents influence us so much. I also regret it because it have been a great investment' (46 years old)
